Man Gives his Wife the Most Touching Birthday Gift The love this man has for his wife and all the care that he took in expressing it in this video that he made for her birthday will definitely make you rethink how deeply you are loving in your life.  This is a short blog because the video says it all.  Watch it now.   http://www.godvine.com/Man-Gives-his-Wife-a-Touching-Birthday-Gift-Before-Dying-of-Cancer-1033.html

I watched this video and it truly made me rethink, love. How fully do we really love? Do we let the little things rankle us or do we just love.  So just love folks.  Just love.

This video is hilarious. Are you committed to love in your life? What is holding you back? What is your greatest fear about being with the love of your life? Talk to me. Let me know what your greatest fears are. I will answer your questions, personally. http://youtu.be/kclir6ti3nc

The STUPID LOVE SHOW.com on Podomatic.com & iTunes

Tell us about your Love Spats

Everyone fights…right? Some people fight below the belt and others above.  Fighting really can be decreased if you are committed to ending the emotional drama.

Some fights are caused when you or your partner cross over healthy boundaries.   What do I mean by this?  Let me give you an example-

I was coaching a couple who have only been together for 14 mos. They were having a rip-roaring verbal fight.  How did it begin?  Well they went to a friends house and agreed to only stay for 30 minutes because there was a two hour drive to get home.  Harry does all the driving so it was in his best interest to make sure that they left at that time.  Instead…he accepts the invitation to have dinner without speaking to Mary about this.  Well, who can eat and run in 30 minutes?  Since Mary didn’t really care when they left and it was Harry who chose to let his belly make the decision it was understandable that he was okay with staying the extra time. A good time was had by all until they were both in the car together and Harry belts out in a very whiny irritated tone of voice:  “Why didn’t you have us leave in 30 minutes. I am tired and now there is a TWO hour drive.”   Mary was shocked about his negativity and after a lovely day and evening it was the last thing she expected him to say.    Now, she was getting blamed for his own choice to stay and eat.    Uh oh…this definitely crossed over a boundary line.    Not O.K. to blame your partner for something you take on, and especially when the decision to accept dinner was not discussed ahead of time.

Faced with a tense two hour drive home with Harry, ….Mary states: ‘Getting cranky about a two hour drive now won’t make the drive any shorter or more pleasant.  We had a great time, don’t ruin it with your negativity.”

Harry, still agitated and not wanting to take full responsibility for his behavior bellows back: ” Well you’re not the one driving.  You get to just sit there and cuddle your dog for two hours.”

Ooooh…that just increased the drama factor 100% because it reminded Mary of the jealousy that Harry has over her relationship with her dog.

But, the main factor here is that there are SOME PEOPLE who do what I call…The PONY factor.   They have fun all day riding the ponies but when the ride is over, they complain bitterly over having to having to clean up the Pony Poo.   As soon as the pleasure is over they don’t want to ‘Pony Up”

The bottom line here is that Mary is living with a partner that doesn’t want to take responsibility for his own actions and decisions.  This is a Victim Mentality…as in…”Every one is doing this to me…wah wah.”  This gets old really fast and it’s really challenging for someone who lives like this to see themselves in the mirror. Recognizing the “blaming” victim behavior and gently confronting it without making the situation worse is a real art.  Are you accidentally walking around and talking from a V mentality?  If you are don’t be hard on yourself. Just realize that in the fish bowl you are swimming in, the water is tainted by Victim thinking, Speaking and Acting.  Most everything that you say or do is “colored” by this.  You may have walking victim-itis and not even realize it, like Harry.  Victims’s always find a PERPETRATOR.   They find someone or something to blame outside of themselves, instead of realizing they may be a MAGNET for drama and things that reconfirm over and over again that they are the poor innocent victim.

Whether you have Victim-itis or not…if you want to have a juicy drama free relationship you must be willing to confront your partner strongly enough that he or she REALLY GETS IT.  Whatever the IT is that you feel they need to learn to grow with.  Don’t enable behavior that will just repeat itself over and over and over again.

Mary was able to STOP the madness and stand up for what she believed in.  She stated, clearly:  “I will not accept the blame or the responsibility for your staying longer than what you originally wanted.”

Harry rebelled a bit and said: “We’re partners and I needed your support.  You didn’t help me leave earlier.”

Mary: ‘You voted with your FEET by staying, just like people going to a dance.  If they like the DJ’s music they vote with their feet and get out on the dance floor.  Your feet were clearly saying, I am not ready to leave.   I am not your caretaker, I care for you and about you and I won’t be babying you by hovering and nagging and saying things like: Didn’t you want to leave already?”

Clearly Harry didn’t like the fact that he had indeed VOTED WITH HIS FEET. He said: Let’s stop talking about this now.  Mary, being fully committed to the quality of their relationship said: Honey, if we don’t handle all of the issues about this now it will continue damaging our relationship.  I won’t want to go anywhere with you and fear that afterwards, you are going to spend the rest of the evening complaining.    I am not taking any responsibility for your choice to stay.

Harry then apologized by saying: “I’m sorry.  I get cranky when I am tired.”     This was a good step in the right direction but…again he wasn’t taking FULL RESPONSIBILITY for his actions.  He was blaming his actions on a “feeling”, making it okay to treat someone badly or rudely just because he was tired.

Mary, recognizing that this was a step in the right direction but was ONLY 80% and being committed to her relationship said:  Thankyou for your apology.  There is only one remaining issue.  The issue is that in my world…it is NEVER okay to blame your behavior on being CRANKY just because you are tired.  It would have been way better for you to just make a comment from the very beginning.  You could have said: Oh why didn’t I have us leave sooner. I am tired and now we have a two hour drive.

If he had said it that way, Mary, could have given him empathy and said:  Well, yes, there is a two hour drive ahead of us and I am sorry you are feeling tired.  How about if we focus on the fun we just had and try to make the trip less boring, tiring and more fun?”

If Mary, had just let Harry continue acting like a victim, blaming her for his choices, eventually she would just shut down emotionally and not want to spend any time with Harry which would have just triggered his rejection button and over time would have ended their relationship.   Who wants that?    Once a couple handles their emotional drama, once and for all, they don’t have to repeat the same old fight over the same old thing.    Handling issues frees up each half of the couple to focus more on what they want in their relationship instead of what they don’t want.  We’re always placing orders in the Universe for what we want and what we don’t want.  If you DON”T help your partner or let your partner help you by recognizing unproductive destructive communication patterns you are telling the UNIVERSE that you want more of that same behavior.  Don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself and be committed to shining the mirror on you or your partners shadow side in such a way that it truly can be addressed, once and for all.

If you don’t feel that you are strong enough to speak up, I highly recommend finding a success coach or relationship coach to support you in finding your true voice.  You will be so glad when you do.

Email and share your thoughts on this story.  What would you do different?  Share what has occurred for you when you do speak up and how you feel about yourself when you don’t speak up.

Take the FREE Soulmate Test found at www.MyDramaFreeRelationship.com

Tom invited his mom over 4 dinner. He lives with a pretty female roommate, Ann. While mom was watching the 2 interact, she started 2 wonder if there was more tween Tom & Ann than met the eye. Reading his mom’s thoughts, T. volunteered, “I know what you must be thinking, but I assure u, Ann & I are just roommates.” A wk later, Ann came 2 Tom saying, “Ever since ur mother came 2 dinner, I’ve been unable to find the silver sugar bowl. You don’t suppose she took it, do u?” “I doubt it, but I’ll email her, just 2 b sure. ” He wrote an email: ‘Dear Mom, I’m not saying that u “did” take the sugar bowl; I’m not saying that u “did not” take it. The fact remains that it has been missing ever since u were here. Love, T’ Tom rec’d a response email fr his Mom which read: ‘Dear son, I’m not sayin that you “do” sleep with Ann, & I’m not sayin that u “do not” sleep with her. But the fact remains that if she was sleeping in her OWN bed, she would have found the sugar bowl by now. Love, Mom’.

Is it VD Day? Or Singles Awareness Day?

Everyone has five different love blocks.

This is normal. No matter how transformed, educated, or balanced you are, you will have five different Love Blocks.

Whenever you are upset at anyone for any reason you can bet that one of your Love Blocks was triggered.

The Top FIVE MOST COMMON LOVE BLOCKS are:
1. Fear of Abandonment.
2. Fear of Committment
3. Fear of being Dominated or Controlled.
4. Fear of being Rejected/Not Accepted
5. Fear of being Hurt Again

You have love blocks if you can answer yes to any of the following questions.
A. You are over 38 and have never been married.
B. You are shy.
C. You haven’t been in a relationship in over 18 mos.
D. You bicker with your partner over lots of little things and never seem to get the real issue resolved.
E. There are power struggles in your relationship.
F. You are fighting about moneyor money is an issue in your relationship.
G. Your feelings get hurt or you are disappointed by your partner frequently.

If you want to know what you can do to resolve Love Blocks in your life and get rid of any negative drama, consider taking one of our
“Breaking Through Love & Abundance Barriers Retreats ” in Carmel, CA by emailing your interest to LovingUniversity@cs.com

The next dates that we are accepting applications for is Mar 25 to 27th.

Copyright 2011 All Rights Reserved. LovingUniversity.com

Happy Valentines Day to all of you.  Thankyou for reading and please ask questions and make comments.

Do You Want to Know the Best Kept Secret About Love?

Have you ever had a grand fantasy about ultimate love that you’ve given up on?

Do you long to feel less burdened by worry, stress, or struggle and to experience the ecstasy of an open heart?

Have there been times you’ve buried your pain in workaholism, over-eating, or over-spending?

Do you feel disappointed that something is missing in your experience of love?

What if the deeper love you are aching for really IS possible? How amazing would it be if you could do something RIGHT NOW to invite that into your life. . .

You CAN.

My friend and colleague, #1 New York Times bestselling author, Marci Shimoff has found a way to help you feel like you’re in love all the time.

In her newest book, Love For No Reason: 7 Steps to Creating a Life of Unconditional Love, Marci offers a revolutionary step-by-step program to live in a profound state of unconditional love EVERY DAY of your life. The kind of love that wells up from deep within and doesn’t depend on another person, situation, or romantic partner.

This simple, holistic program—based on current scientific research, ancient wisdom, proven techniques, and Marci’s interviews with 150 Love Luminaries—will make you a magnet for love.

To experience a greater state of love NOW, click here: http://www.thelovebook.com

WHAT CAN LOVE FOR NO REASON DO FOR YOU?

Marci’s breakthrough approach will help you reset your “love set point” as easily as you reset a thermostat. You’ll automatically turn up the heat on giving, receiving—and accepting—more love and abundant blessings in your life. You’ll be able to:

Open your heart fully and experience deep love from the inside, even in the midst of challenges.

Enjoy more fulfilling relationships with others AND with yourself.

Turn off your body’s stress response and turn on your body’s “love response” for better health and well-being.

Experience greater success and satisfaction.

Help your family, community and the world.

This is TRUE LOVE—it’s what your heart wants most deeply and it’s what the world needs most urgently. Whatever your experience of love is right now—whether you’re in pain or feeling content—you can feel the joy and freedom of an even more open heart.

If you’re ready for a more dazzling, love-filled life starting today, click here: http://www.thelovebook.com

IF MARCI’S NAME SOUNDS FAMILIAR…IT SHOULD!

Marci’s the New York Times best-selling author of Happy For No Reason as well as co-author of SIX books in the phenomenally popular Chicken Soup For The Soul series. Her books have sold more than 14 million copies worldwide in 31 languages! She’s also a featured teacher in the hit film “The Secret.”

In Love for No Reason, Marci shares the most important, life-changing message of all—the one that will dissolve heartache, pain, and emptiness. You’ll learn the 14 Love Keys she discovered in her extensive research that will bring you lasting joy and fulfillment.

“If only you could love enough,
you would be the happiest and most powerful being in the universe.”
- Emmet Fox

If you want to feel like you’re in love ALL THE TIME, click here: http://www.thelovebook.com

WHY NOW?

Because Love for No Reason is the one thing that can make your 2011 fulfilling beyond your wildest dreams.

AND if you buy Love for No Reason TODAY, you’ll receive The Love for No Reason Gift Package as a BONUS—this includes a powerful recording to remove your blocks to love, audio interviews with famous Love Luminaries, a 5-minute daily love practice, practical ebooks, and much more!

So, I’m heartily recommending this book to EVERYONE I KNOW, giving it an enthusiastic two thumbs up.

If you’re ready to take a giant leap in your experience of love, then this book is for you.
Click here: http://www.thelovebook.com

Wishing you a year of extraordinary love,
Susan Bradley Author of How to be Irresistible to the Opposite Sex www.LovingUniversity.com www.GuidetoFlirting.com

WHAT THE EXPERTS ARE SAYING ABOUT LOVE FOR NO REASON:

“Marci Shimoff has her finger on the pulse of the greatest evolutionary leap in the history of humanity—our leap out of fear into the attitudinal matrix of love. In Love for No Reason, she provides to the world…a compelling case for the power of love. This book has answers. And Marci Shimoff is a worthy guide.”
—from the Foreword by Marianne Williamson, #1 New York Times bestselling author of A Return to Love

“Love for No Reason helps us establish a foundation of unconditional love that supports greater happiness in our lives. Poignant stories and Marci Shimoff’s characteristic insights guide us to understand at a visceral level how we can love for no reason.”
—Dr. Mehmet Oz, coauthor of YOU: Raising Your Child

“Marci Shimoff has written another life-changing book. In Love for No Reason, she lays out a powerful and comprehensive program that anyone can do to experience a more lasting state of unconditional love. If you want to experience inner fulfillment on a whole new level, read this book.”
—Jack Canfield, New York Times bestselling author of The Success Principles and cocreator of the Chicken Soup for the Soul series

“Marci has captured the essence of finding and keeping unconditional love. Love for No Reason open you up to a lifetime of loving.”
—Susan Bradley, bestselling author of How to be Irresistible to the Opposite Sex and Irresistible Prescriptions for Love.

Love for No Reason is a brilliant how-to guide for expanding your capacity to love. Highly recommended.
—John Gray, #1 New York Times bestselling author of Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus

P.S. Marci’s onto something BIG. I’m heartily recommending this breakthrough book to everyone, giving it two very enthusiastic thumbs up! Get it TODAY, and you’ll also receive the exclusive “Love For No Reason Gift Package” as a BONUS. Click here:

http://www.thelovebook.com

Have you considered that the journey to love or really your journey to love, is way bigger than just dating and meeting alot of people? Yes it’s more than, falling in love, getting married and having children. I have always been motivated by “love” and explored love. All types of love are important to me.

I believe that if singles and couples look at “love” in a different light, they will be more successful and happy on their own personal journey through life’s challenges. In my own relationships I have always tried to nurture and be responsible for my own personal growth as well as how we grow as a couple. My partner,Al and I invented a simple but very effective-6 step system to falling in love everyday-we call it the K-I-S-S-E-S system. Today’s blog is about the second letter in the system. I for inspiration. We have seen in our own relationship as well as the couples we work with a direct correlation between couples being happy with each other and their life based on “Inspiration”. When couples cause each other to grow they inspire each other. And when each half of a couple inspire and co-inspire each other EVERY DAY, their lives are 100% more happy and fulfilled. If you can inspire each other, you will grow faster, create more opportunities for you and your life together. Luckily, it’s easy to inspire each other. Even a small act will give you or your partner an inspirational “hit” if you will. A feeling of pride will well up inside you when you watch your partner tackle and overcome some work challenge or when you visibly see your beloved let go of some bad habit.

Al, has always used as a mantra the following: See the job. Do the job. Stay out of suffering.

We use this mantra to grow with. If either one of us wants to complain about some task we have to manage we give each other full permission to say out loud. See the job. Do the job. Stay out of suffering.

This one small act, helps us grow and use some of the principles of “The Secret”. By focusing on what you want, rather than what you don’t want, we create more ease, play, and joy in our daily life together. We hold each other accountable for our brain chatter and not polluting each others state of mind with useless complaints. See the job. Do the job. Stay out of suffering. You can take this on as well.

In the book: The Road Less Traveled- Scott considers the nature of love, which he considers the driving force behind spiritual growth. The second section of his book mainly attacks a number of misconceptions about love: that romantic love exists (he considers it a very destructive myth), that it is about dependency, that true love is not “falling in love”.’. Falling in love is actually a feeling. He believes that “true” love is about the extending of one’s ego boundaries to include another, and about the spiritual nurturing of another.

When Al and I remind each other to let go of suffering and complaining and just DO THE JOB (Whatever needs to just get done.) our life keeps humming along.

Your journey to love and loving will have far greater success once you adopt the philosophy that part of the value in having a love relationship beyond companionship is to help each other grow through your daily activities and “how” you take on your life. How will you help your partner grow?

I wouldn’t trade Al in for the world because he nurtures me, supports my being a better person, each day in ways that no other man has ever done before. Are you doing that with your partner? If you are single, are you willing to also help your partner grow?

I “know” that I also cause him to grow beyond what he would have done on his own. Why? When singles live on their own, they can get away with not keeping their promises or even their New Years resolutions because there is no one to notice when they are not keeping their word. It’s easy to act spiritual and kind when you live by yourself. When you live alone, you don’t have to share anything with anyone and don’t have to compromise. But, the moment you realize that your actions directly impact the quality of someone else’s life it’s a very different experience.

I invite you to take on being a source of “Inspiration” today in how you take on your journey to love. If you are not dating…get busy. If you are in a relationship, ask yourself if you have done anything to inspire your partner lately.

Inspiration is not achieved by buying flowers or gifts. Inspiration is more about how you operate in your life. Are you community minded? Do you give your partner reason to feel proud of you? There are many ways that Al inspires me but one of them is his weekly reminder to come from a mindset of being the eye of the storm rather than allowing storms in life to dictate what I do or how I act. It’s a simple but powerful act that supports me in being the best I can be.

I, in turn, support him by reminding him if he complains: to See the Job, Do the job, and stay out of suffering.

Go inspire someone today.

Are You Scaring Your Soulmate Away?

Are you Scaring Away Your SoulMate? Take the SoulMate Checklist.

by Susan Bradley RN Award-winning author of How to be Irresistible to the Opposite Sex, Irresistible Prescriptions for Love, and How to Flirt and NOT look like you are in Heat!

If you think there is no soul mate for you, you might scaring away potential soul mates from even getting close to forming relationships with you. People do this in so many different ways. Everything from not flirting, to serial dating, or even worse: not dating at all.  Some people even look like on the outside that they are doing all the right things but just aren’t lucky enough to find “the one”.

I can show you how to get rid of the barriers and open yourself to new relationships and letting your soul mates into not only your life, but your heart, too.  Before I do that, see if you can relate to the following singles.

Angela Nany * swore off relationships the day her husband of eight years left her for a twenty-something barmaid in San Jose. Though this was her third marriage, she still took the plunge.  She felt three was the charm and, after all, Frank showed all the qualities in a soul mate and a marriage partner that no one had ever shown her. After this traumatic ending and experience, she closed off her heart to future relationships, giving up on Love once again.   What happened to her belief in the theory that you can find THE ONE who meets all your goals and expectations.  Put on the back burner of her life for sure.

Mary Short*, fresh out of college, had enough of her share of “flings” and was ready for the real deal.  Yes, she clearly made her list of what she wanted but after every date ended up in the bedroom, she vowed that she was going to give up dating altogether. “It’s just not worth trying and trying,” she said. “The good guys are already taken. I’d rather stay home with my dog or go out with friends.”

John Fremont* married his college sweetheart. After college, they married and one and a half years later, became the proud parents of a strapping baby girl. Two years later, another child joined their family and then a year later, the third child was born. John was a good father as well as a good husband, delighting his wife with anything her heart desired. He laughed at his good luck and never took advantage of the situation by treating every day with his family as if it were the first. Eighteen years to the day they married, John lost his wife to terminal cancer. He grieved to the point where he could not come to grips with her passing and decided from that day forward he would never want to be with another woman again.

Alex Blackwell*, age 42, a very sharp looking fit guy, well dressed and involved in bringing unique events into the community where he lived,  looked in my eyes and said: “Relationships?  I don’t do relationships anymore. Too much drama.”  I looked back into his eyes and said: If you choose to live authentically and consciously, relationships do not have to have negative drama.

Manny Sites*, age 52, a  perpetual “nice guy but just not anyone’s type” has gone on over 700 dates in the past ten years. In fact, he even goes out on three to four dates per week, all with the same results. These women all want him as a friend but not a romantic partner.  Even though he has taken some flirting coaching, attended some seminars, goes to singles events he is still making the same mistakes day after day after day. He tries for a while, giving it a good go but goes right back to his cave. In fact we even told him he needed to STOP dating for a while and focus on himself.

Alexa Right*, age 36 is headed down the path of no relationships and sabotaging herself from having the family she so wants.  A successful entrepreneur, she’s used to calling all the shots and usually finds men who aren’t as “strong” as she is in life.  She doesn’t realize how to turn off her day to day work life to “be” in a relationship with a man who totally supports her.  Instead of relaxing into her feminine, men feel her take control attitude in even the most subtle ways.  They either cave in and do it her way or just leave.  Either way, there is no winning unless she learns what she’s

What do these six people have in common?

To a certain degree, they have all given up on looking for their soul mates altogether.   They have closed off that path of their journey which is necessary for total self-growth and finding their higher selves.  ( You may say to yourself: But I am not doing that. I am dating occasionally, I’ve read some relationship books and even taken some seminars about love.) Read on: Even from the outside when it looks like you are doing “everything in your power” to meet the love of your life, your subconscious belief systems may be stopping you.

They have entered a carefully crafted comfort zone inside themselves to protect them from any possibility of future disappointment and pain, they have closed it to future soul mates.  When they put up this shield, they have also cut off a very necessary part of their life’s journey.  The worst part is that after a few months or years, they don’t even realize they have closed the door to love.

Why is this so bad?

The reason is that, unknowingly, they have severed an important and vital part of their well-being. Your higher self, wants you to have a soulmate.
When you have a relationship with someone who truly “gets” you, truly has your back, and is willing to do whatever it takes to grow together, the quality of your life is full, juicy, and you wake up excited EVERYDAY and not just on your day off.

Studies have shown that even unhappy couples have better health than singles.  Financial Experts, such as Linda Parker who teaches people how to invest like Billionaires and Tammy Foley, the Queen of Financial Clarity,  both believe that financial possibility and stability is key to longevity, compatibility, and life long satisfaction in long term relationships. Tammy loves to say:” What good is all that money if you are doing everything ALONE?”

The people above have retreated within themselves to the point where finding love has no real meaning or priority in their life anymore. Of course they are really only kidding themselves and living behind their protective fortresses.   And, in so doing, they have opened themselves to the prospects of losing what zest they have left in their lives and even getting stress-related diseases.
The other issue is that I have found that love and success with money are inter-related.  A true soulmate relationship enhances every aspect of your life.  Singles often put off living their lives fully until they find a partner but often end up grower older and older hoping their magical partner will just one day appear in front of them.  This is NOT going to happen unless you take specific actions to make this a reality.  Go to www.LovingUniversity.com/soulmate_checklist.cfm and take our soulmate test to see just how ready you really are to bring love back into your life.

Do you like me?

Manny, has bought new clothes to make him seem more alpha, went on undercover flirting seminars but still kept coming from that boring “nice guy” place and giving away his power to women.  When he does that, the women cannot be in their feminine essence and without that, no romance can possibly happen.   What does he need? Some belief change work at a core level to find out what he is really hiding from when it comes to women.  Our educated guess is that he is afraid of being really vulnerable with women, when in fact he keeps on giving away his power with every conversation, match.com email exchange, and date.

In the case of John, grieving is a natural process and one that should be completed before he even thinks about carrying on another relationship. If he were to jump right into a relationship, without going through the entire healing process, only disastrous results would occur.

However, in time, John will heal and he will start to feel those old feelings of having someone to share his life with. Whether he acts on these impulses, it all depends on whether he is comfortable going within himself to do so. At some point John, has to realize that shielding himself from his other soul mates is not going to help him heal. If he does not, he will be alone forever and his children will miss out on having their father as a role model for love and relationships. This is just as damaging for John as for his children.

By allowing future soul mates to enter his life, he will realize why his deceased wife came into his life and left so abruptly. It’s all a learning process and one in which John needs to enter in order for him to release the negativity he is bestowing on himself in the name of grief.

The other three are merely products of relationships gone bad. They all figure what’s the point?  I’ve had some of my students even tell me that they think they just might not be marriage material since no one wants them.  Ouch!  Until they release this negative thinking, they will bring this baggage into whatever future relationships that may be in stow for them and it will be a pattern they will continue until they realize that this negative thinking is what is preventing them from finding their true soul mates and finding the happiness they are looking for.

Baggage from past relationships shouldn’t hinder you from giving up on finding your soul mate. Once you understand that they all served purposes towards your self-growth – even the bad ones – and you can work through the karma associated with it, you’re that much closer to finding your higher self.

It’s your higher self where you find the life, the creativity and the love you deserve.  What kind of baggage do you think you have to unpack? Write down the three most impactful relationships of your life. What regrets do you still have surrounding these?

There are eight levels of loving and most people live in the lowest levels of one to three.  John Assaraf, from The Secret, recently reminded me that “Love is the Highest Vibration.”  It truly is.  Make sure you are vibrating using the upper most levels of love right now.

Susan Bradley RN is a world renown Relationship Expert. She helps people fall in love everyday!  See www.LovingUniversity.com for the Soulmate Checklist and visit her blog at www.GuidetoFlirting.com She lives in the Monterey/Carmel area of CA and teaches weekend retreats on Breaking Through Love Barriers to Find Your Soulmate.  Susan has been featured on CNN, Montel Williams, Good Day New York, in magazines such as Cosmo and Elle for her proven systems on finding your soulmate.  Her ideal client is someone who wants to be authentic in life and love, loves to contribute to others, has read some self help books and taken some seminars, while being ready to invest their resources, time, and effort in finding love NOW, instead of someday.  Working with Susan and her partner Al is NOT for the faint of heart.  If you are someone who hasn’t completely given up on love and want to really make it happen this time around in life.  Send us an email and take your next step towards living your life full out with L-O-V-E now on the front burner and not the back:  LovingUniversity@cs.com

SoulmateChecklist: www.LovingUniversity.com/soulmate_checklist.cfm

Sign up for the Free Preview Call where Susan reveals her 8 Step Proven System on Finding Your Soulmate: Email: CupidsAccomplice@gmail.com

*names have been changed

Al and Susan want you to FALL in LOVE again!

Two new movies are coming out this weekend.

“Marry Me” with Lucy Lu and “How do you Know?” with Reese Witherspoon.

What most men do not know is that there is a lot to learn from the movies on romancing women.

You can learn also learn what NOT to do.   There is a scene in “How do you Know”  where her old boyfriend calls her up and says something really stupid to try and get her back. He says. : “I know what to say now. I wrote it on a piece of paper.”

He then scrambles to find the paper and says: “When you left I was so upset that I broke a lamp.”

What you should be asking yourself is this:  What should he have said?  What would be the PERFECT thing to say to woo her back to him.  What had she probably been starved to hear from him in the first place.

The answer is: “The moment you left, I knew that i had screwed up and I had to make it better. Or ” I realized how much I love you.”

So much of what her old boyfriend says in just the movie trailer shows guys all the WRONG things to say!

Believe it or not yes, men get nervous and say these things everyday. If they didn’t, I wouldn’t have a job coaching people to take the guess work out. Men make so many costly mistakes that could be avoided, like buying her a TV instead of jewelry, or worse yet, not buying her anything at all for her birthday.

Watch movies, like Hitch, and occasionally Sex in the City to get some free clues on what to do, like how to kiss and beautiful things to say. Rip off the lines!   They work.

For Example: Try walking into the room when you get home and ask: “Hey, Are there any kisses in this place?”  She will love it.  The main character in the movie:  Hitch teaches: Lean forward only 90% of the way towards the woman and wait for her to come the other 10%-  Well, he’s right!    You don’t want to look desperate but you also want to watch for the other signs that she’s already in to you before doing that or you will look very silly.   Just ask me if you see a scene in a movie and you aren’t sure whether that would work in real life or not. I will honestly tell you.  As far as “How do you Know?”  As in how do you know if someone is the one-go take my free Soulmate Test at www.LovingUniversity.com  and also please comment on the movies once you seen them. Let’s all have a riveting discussion about the techniques we see in the movies!   It’s almost New Year’s Eve… who are you going to be kissing?

Wearing Heart Shaped Glasses

We help people fall IN love EVERYDAY! When we tell people this, they always as us, well How do you do this?

My partner, Al and I strongly believe that if you are not falling in love then you are falling out of love. Do you feel in love with your partner right now? Rate the level of love and connection that you are experiencing with your partner on a scale of 1-10. Ten being the highest and one the lowest.

Whatever your number is ask yourself, Why? What’s missing? or What makes it so great and wonderful?

What was said or done that makes you feel inspired about to be in partnership? What was it? Another forgotten birthday or anniversary? or a Anniversary celebration that rocked your socks off? Did your partner lighten your load by taking care of some everyday detail of life like making sure some bill was paid? If you are at a 5 or below, perhaps you are suffering from countless snippy remarks that people are known to give each other during times of stress.

Do you remember all the times your partner said something snippy and reactive to you? You and I both know that it wasn’t the words that were said but the “tone” of voice that really hit you in the gut.

Today, I am going to give you Part One of our Six Step Proven System to Falling in Love Every day.

Follow my new 6 part system for Falling in Love Everyday, and you won’t fall out of Love anytime soon. This first step is a HUGE, HUGE, HUGE and critical piece.

I grew up in a family that used sarcasm to show affection. Did it work? NO WAY! My dad used to say things like: What are you stupid? Something he learned from his dad and so on. This is where you and I learned how to deliver those snippy comments that tarnish our ability to trust and love again.

Al and I made a commitment to be a “safe harbor” for each other. safe Harbors don’t include having to watch out for the irritated snotty comments in life. Don’t you think that Falling in Love should be a DAILY experience? and not just on Saturday night?

Everyday is a day for Love and Loving. Our K-I-S-S-E-S system will rev up your existing relationship.
Early in our relationship Al told me that he had a million kisses to share with me. I have to say that it melted a part of my heart. Since then we invented the K-I-S-S-E-S system for our own relationship which has now helped so many of our friends and hopefully my new friends like you.

Are you ready for the FIRST STEP of the K-I-S-S-E-S System? It’s remarkably simple and really really works. The K stands for Kindness. Al says it also stands for Kisses. Ok Honey. I got that point in for you.

K: is for Kindness. I know, I know, you say you love each other but then why on earth do you snap at each other with an awkward or even a darn right MEAN comment? Most couples don’t know how to be kind to each other on a daily basis. They also don’t know how to resolve and “get over” all of the times their partner said mean spirited things. Don”t you just cringe when you hear couples having spats with little barbs in public? Oooh ouch.

Early in our relationship, Al said to me: Do you expect these dishes to wash themselves? Are you used to someone else doing the dishes? Oooh! I can tell you that I wasn’t feeling the love in that moment. Reacting to Al’s tone of voice, I wanted to quip back with something like. “Well, why don’t you just put your little white apron on and get busy.” LOL. Like that would have worked. I didn’t say it but When he shot out that comment, I was busy doing followup calls for my vacation rental business which was a bigger priority than when the dishes got done. He couldn’t have known back then. In my world, my housekeepers handled those kinds of things so that I could focus on the customers.

Learning to delegate helps a lot of relationships so long as you are not just delegating to each other. But that’s for a different blog.

After we got through those moments we vowed to create something different in our life and started working on a LOVE CHARTER if you will. And part of our charter was to talk to each other in a kind and respectful voice EVEN IF WE were stressed and irritated. And when we slip up…we clean it up that same day.

All it takes is one comment with “the TONE” or even “the look” to blow any romantic feelings and connections you have with your partner for HOURS. You may not realize this, but EVERY TIME you stomach one of those TONES without resolving the issue with your partner…YOU WILL FALL a couple notches out of love.

Love cannot be juicy when you or your partner keep each other negatively triggered with those TONES. Make no bones about it. They hurt, they piss you off, they irritate you. Don’t you feel something in your gut when someone, anyone, delivers a snotty reply to you? Before you know it, your knee jerk reaction shoots something back just to show that:
A. You noticed their tone and you don’t want them to get away with it. and
B. You are going to stand up for yourself.

But, do you want to know what’s even worse than slipping up and being mean? NOT even discussing it in the first place and not making up. Not apologizing for that low blow will cost you in the end. And it’s not enough to just say: “I’m Sorry.” That’s a great start, but not anywhere near enough. Think of each negatively charged comment as a nail in a coffin. When you’ve delivered enough of them it seals the coffin and your relationship is DEAD ON ARRIVAL or even before.

Before you panic and worry that you or your partner may have already delivered so many below the belt comments to each other and you might never recover-there is hope for you. You can stop being a reaction machine.

The very first step is making a decision. CHOOSE to use KINDNESS in your relationship. EVERYDAY! It gets easier every day. I promise you. Al and I just don’t have the time of day to waste in being right about something or irritated and neither do you. Life is way too short.

Commit to starting TODAY. Just say to yourself. PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION.

Notice when you or your partner delivers some communication that rankles either of you.
Be kind to yourself. Take a deep breath and hold it. Count to Ten! or TWENTY, but don’t react immediately. The biggest and most important step is in deciding to have a KINDNESS culture in your relationship. You won’t get it right every time but if you just go back to the K for Kindness in the K-I-S-S-E-S system your relationships and the quality of your life will be way way way more juicy.

Please feel free to add your comments and questions on this blog. We love it when you write us back and share what you have learned. We use this system to coach the couples we help but wanted to share it with the people who haven’t had the opportunity to experience meeting us in person and working with us.

We hope you have a Million Kisses to share with your partner, starting today.
Susan & Al